Let me preface this by saying this might end up being a very long story to post in the forums and once it’s posted it may very well be one of those things where “you just had to be there”… but here is my stalker story.
Let me give you the cast of characters.
My dorm roommate, the one I got along with – Joe (he won’t mind me giving his name)
The Stalker – we’ll just call her ‘stalker’
The Stalker’s Roommate (female) – we’ll just call her ‘stalker roommate’
Now for the setting…
My first year of college, living in the only dorms on campus. Because it was the only dorm on campus, it was a co-ed dorm. It was four floors:
Floor one – (guys/girls)
Floor two – (all guys)
Floor three – (all girls)
Floor four – (guys/girls)
Joe and I lived on the second floor, stalker and stalker roommate lived on the fourth floor. I really enjoyed our dormitory because for the most part everyone just left their doors open whenever they were home and people would just pop in and out of people’s rooms to say hi or hang out for a while. It was a very nice community vibe.
For the first term of college everyone met a group of people from classes and the dorms and made friends. In the second term of college, everyone introduces their friends to all of their other friends. This is how I met stalker. Joe, my roommate, was friends with stalker’s roommate. We were introduced through the two of them.
So I met stalker at an informal get together, she was attractive, smart, funny, we had a lot of the same interests and really enjoyed each others company. Now before you start thinking ‘I know where this is going…’ it wasn’t like that. I was in a relationship at the time. My high school girlfriend and I were still trying to make the long-distance relationship thing work. Stalker had a boyfriend as well and they were doing the long-distance thing to. In my mind, it wasn’t a romantic attraction, it was a hey what a cool person, I like hanging out with her.
So that’s kind of how it started and over the course of the next couple of weeks we would hang out occasionally. I would be in my room (again doors always open) and she would stop by and hang out for a few minutes. Sometimes we would go do stuff together but not like dating. Hard to explain, maybe an example would be better.
Stalker: “Hey Bryan, I have to go to this one man show being put on in the drama building tonight for credit for one of my classes. I’m not really looking forward to it, do you want to go with me?”
Me: “Sure, I’m not doing anything”
Stalker: “Hey Bryan, I have a recital tonight (she was a voice major) it would be great if you showed up.”
Me: “Sure, I’m not doing anything”
Now I know how this sounds… Jesus Bryan did you EVER do ANYTHING. The answer is yes, but never anything truly important.
So that was how it went for the first month or so. It worked out really well, Rob, stalker, stalker’s roommate and I hung out sometimes – all good, happy times.
Then stalker and her boyfriend starting having problems, this is when things started getting creepy. It all happened gradually which is probably why I didn’t really see it coming. Stalker would stop by to visit (even still, door is always open) and stay… and stay… and stay. The first time or two it wasn’t too bad, we’d talk and stuff but you reach a point where you don’t want to talk for 2 hours because I just talked to you for 2 hours yesterday and not nearly enough interesting things have happened in the last 24 hours that merit another 2 hour conversation. Then it was stopping by in the morning, in the afternoon and at least once in the evening and the visits gradually got longer until maybe 3-4 hours.
By now, stalker had somehow found out my entire course schedule and knew what classes I had when. She knew when I should be getting back to the dorms from classes and would either be waiting in my room with Rob or would call within minutes of me walking in the door.
If for whatever reason I was late getting back from class, Joe would greet me with a disgusted look and say “dude, stalker has been calling every 5 minutes wanting to know why you aren’t back yet”… as Joe is telling me this, the phone would ring and he would shrug and go back to watching TV.
I’d pick up the phone and stalker would say “Hi, where have you been? Can I come over I want to see you?”
So I should mention that by this point my girlfriend and I had broken up; another tragic victim of the inevitable demise of the long-distance relationship. However, there was still no romantic attraction to stalker because, well – starting to get creepy. Stalker and I had a few conversations where she would ask if I ever considered dating her, now that we were single. I would explain that we were friends, but wouldn’t make a good couple – mostly because I tend to avoid dating stalkers. Other people living in the dorms started mentioning how stalker was always around, was she my girlfriend because it looked like she thought she was.
Stalker would come over and stay until late at night, finally decide to go back to her room, which consisted of walking up two flights of stairs, and then would call me and ask me what I was doing. Me: “Stalker, nothing has changed since you left and walked up two flights of stairs”
Needless to say, this has been annoying for about 3 weeks, now its just pissing me off. I try to be polite and friendly and tell stalker that I would like a little space. Both Joe and I talk to stalker’s roommate (who is a total sweetheart by the way) and tell her that she needs to talk to stalker and put an end to this. Another week or two goes by with no change.
Stalker isn’t taking the hint so I go from polite to complete asshole.
Stalker is standing outside my dorm room knocking on the door (door is NO LONGER open). Knocks for about 5 minutes and then goes back to her room and calls, calls every 10 minutes until I answer the phone.
Me: Don’t even ask who it is, “what do you need stalker?”
Stalker: “Didn’t you hear me knocking on your door?”
Me: “Yes, yes I did”
Stalker: “Why didn’t you let me in?”
Me: “Because I don’t want to see you stalker.”
Stalker: “Why not?”
Me: “Because I see you all the time! You are always here!”
Stalker: “OK, you don’t have to be an a-hole, I’ll give you some space”
We would have this conversation again, in about an hour, and again that night.
The phone calls continued, she would show up places where she knew I would be, she would be waiting for me outside my room.
I made one final plea to stalker’s roommate to please talk some sense into her and then one night it all came to an ugly end.
Stalker had a few high school friends come into town to visit. I don’t know how or where but they were drinking – apparently a lot because she showed up at my dorm room with her two friends from high school and she was plastered. It’s about midnight and she is banging on my door, Joe and I were up listening to music. I open the door and roll my eyes giving her a what the hell do you want look.
Stalker says defensively: “I know, I know, but my friends are in town and I just wanted them to meet you.”
Stalker: “Because you’re my ‘friend’”
So stalker in her slurred speech, and wabbly gait comes into my room with her two high-school friends and stalker’s roommate.
She proceeds to sit on my bed and talk trash to me for about 5 minutes. Not shouting or anything just being snide and making inappropriate comments. Stalker’s roommate quickly realizes this could get ugly so she helps stalker up and starts to usher her towards the door. Stalker make’s one final comment and I reach my boiling point. I am not a hot tempered person and I typically don't raise my voice in anger, but I started to let stalker have it. Stalker's roommate saw it coming and she tried to stop me. I turn to stalker’s roommate, give her a stern look and say “get her out, now.” Stalker’s roommate mouths the words “I’m sorry” and all the drunk girls leave, with stalker still mouthing off into the hallway about me.
About 10 minutes later the phone rings, I refuse to answer it because I know what’s going on. I tell Joe not to answer the phone but he does anyway, I think mostly because he is finding tonight's events actually quite entertaining and he is secretly hoping that we are only at intermission and the show isn’t over yet. Stalker’s roommate is on the phone, Stalker is sobbing in the background. Stalker’s roommate apologizes and says that Stalker keeps trying to leave the room to come down and talk to me about what happened. The only way they could convince her to stay in the room is if stalker’s roommate agreed to call so that stalker could talk to me.
I pick up the phone, listen to about 3 minutes of unintelligible drunk/crying gibberish and tell stalker in a relatively nice way to “sleep it off”. The next 2 or 3 days, stalker would stop by and bang on the door for a few minutes and then leave.
At this point I was absolutely done, being nice didn’t work, being a jerk didn’t work, I made it very clear to stalker and her roommate that I didn’t want to see stalker again, period.
I managed to ride it out to the end of the year without seeing stalker. She pretty much left me completely alone after that night. I think once or twice throughout the rest of the year there was a note or letter on my door, but she never showed up to see me again.